A work in progress

“Je vais bientôt trouver mon chemin” is currently my favorite phrase, and is written in one of my favorite languages. Although I will most likely never be able to speak the language fluently, I can still appreciate how beautiful words and phrases are pronounced and spoken. This phrase translates to “I will soon find my way”, which is something I constantly keep telling myself for reassurance that I am not meant to know where I am going just yet.

Telling people that I aspire to become a freelance journalist/web designer is something that terrifies not only myself, but those who are also terrified for my life choices. Now that’s not saying that freelance is an awful career choice, because honestly the idea of free creativity, personal projects and creating for clients that are a fan of your individual style really excites me. I also understand that as soon as I have completed my degree I won’t be able to work for myself and will need to work for a company. Working for myself however, is the ultimate goal.

This means, finding my way to this ultimate goal regarding my career, as well as the pursuit to personal happiness, is going to include extremely turbulent times where I will just want to give up and continue my 9-5 job. I already feel as if I have experienced this. From September to now, (May 2017), I have pushed through some difficult situations and emotions that almost made me give up on my goals. Things build up and seem to explode all at the same moment, making things appear unsolvable and too difficult.

However, within all this pain and the rocky situations, I have discovered parts that I never knew about myself. I really enjoy reading and it wasn’t just something I enjoyed as a child. I have also discovered that poetry and writing in journals is therapy within itself and helps me disconnect with the world just long enough to compose my thoughts and feelings. I have discovered how much I want to travel this rock we call Earth and explore every single corner reachable. I have also realised how strong I actually am, and how I can do anything I want if I truly want it.

Although there has been a lot of pain throughout these few months, I have experienced so much that I never imagined I would and realised so much about myself through the bad. I can only anticipate the next months and years being similar to these few months I have experienced with such big changes to my life, maybe more difficult, maybe better. We will have to see. But as I said before, I will find my way soon and even if that’s not the near future, I am excited for the next chapter in my journey.


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Settling Into New Adventures

Nobody said that new chapters were going to be easy. We tend to forget that new adventures are still a part of life. A life where mistakes and sadness is going to happen as well as excitement and the happiest memories you will remember for years to come.

If you have been reading my blog for a while now, you will have followed my journey to university from the application to the first week of my “new adventure”. Well it’s been a few more weeks since I wrote my first post on my experience of university. Have things changed? Hell yes. Have feelings towards university changed? Completely!

In all honesty, I have found adapting to the university life seriously difficult. Alongside starting university, I also managed to get myself a job. I’m not going to sugar coat it, in my second week I was hating it and contemplating whether any of it was for me and what other paths I could go down. My mental health wasn’t too good and I was feeling really low. You’re probably thinking, “but Liv, you’re only in your fourth week. How much could have changed since then?”. So much has changed and for the better and I finally think, and hope, I’m beginning to fit in and adapt to the next three years of my life. Managing your time correctly and having a balance between everything helps.

Sometimes expectations aren’t always lived up to and this is what was holding me back. I was so caught up in university not being everything I expected to be, that I wasn’t enjoying what it actually is! University is hard work. The work load is crazy. You get support from lectures and your personal tutor, completely. But you don’t get the support like at college or sixth form. It is completely independent and this is a big change to adapt to! With me, I like to know I’m doing things correctly and didn’t have much confidence in my writing. However, I’m starting to change my mindset on that and I understand I am a good writer and just need guidance here and there!

I’ve learnt how to ask for help in life as well as at university. Sometimes, things get difficult and sometimes, you understand what it is you can do to resolve that difficulty in your life. For me, I was taking too many hours on at my new job. I was soooo worried about asking them to take some hours off that I was working and stressing about not completing my readings for lectures the next day, etc. Then I thought, this is my future that I need to be working towards as well as my mental health. The stress of knowing I wasn’t completing enough work with the tiredness I was feeling was seriously impacting on me so I changed it. It has helped so much!

As I said, I’m approaching week four and things are beginning to get more serious. University is kicking in and the work load is getting higher and higher, yet I’m feeling healthier and better every day which I’m so happy about! That is from making little changes in my life. Instead of trying to please others, I’m focussing on my own mental state and the way I feel.

Sometimes the portrayal of university is that it is easy to settle in and such an amazing experience that I feel the mixed opinions get lost in the freshers experience and the friendships that are made. Of course everybody is different! Yes, I am liking university and I have made some really cool friends! However, you’re not going to feel on top of the world and amazing at every point of this journey, (not just because of the hangover either!)

University is a big adaptation to your life and it can be difficult as is any other big changes in your life! I realised I didn’t like change but it has to happen in order to develop as a person as well as experience life. As I said, we tend to forget that new adventures are still a part of life. The new adventure is going to be difficult just as much as its going to be absolutely amazing!

 

 

 

First week of University!

Its finally here!

This week marks the start of my adventure to gaining a degree in Media and Communications. The start of new experiences, new friendships, a new chapter in my life. On the train to university, I couldn’t help but become overwhelmed with how much I was already stepping out of my comfort zone!

For the past 7 years of my life, I have travelled the same journey on the same bus route, with the same people having similar conversations day in and day out. However, on this particular sunny Monday, I was travelling alone with a book, travelling on an 8:07 train on my way to the second biggest city in the UK to begin the first week of my studies. For the whole summer, the idea of travelling alone terrified me and trains were never in question as a means of travel. But for university, it was my only option! Flash forward to today, five days after, I am already planning trips across the country to visit friends and explore new places on my own! Never would I have thought it would be this easy to face an anxious thought and understand that I am truly in control of my choices and life!

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I have never had an issue with talking to new people and making new friends, but when there are so many people from across the country in the same room as you, it becomes a completely terrifying activity to introduce yourself! Nevertheless, I have managed to get through the week without completely making an ass out of myself and showing myself up!

Since I’m commuting to university, I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to get the same experience as others that live on campus! Meeting new room-mates and creating a friendship group as soon as you get there, that sort of thing was much easier if you’re sharing a flat together! Even though I’m not in that positon, I went to one of the Freshers events with my best friend Ellie (love you gurl!) and we had THE best time ever! It was super fun and if you don’t drink too much, pretty cheap as well! We’re going to another on Monday and I am SOOO excited for it!

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Finally, even though I have lived near Birmingham all my life and travelled there a few times, I never realised how much I was actually missing out on and how little I had explored! The only times I usually went to Birmingham was to go to gigs and meet up with friends; therefore, I had never explored Digbeth and The Custard Factory. However, with the welcome week task that we had, I managed to see sites that I had never seen before! I’ll include some pictures below and also, here’s a link to the video we made for our task. We didn’t win a prize but hey-ho, we had a great day!

All in all, to sum up the week in one word it would have to be insightful! Its introduced me to what times to travel and not to get up late after a night out on your second day, oops! It’s allowed me to understand the different types of people outside of the safe four walls in a school building. It’s also made me realise how different the world is outside of everything you’re used to, as well as realising how my choice to go to university and study Media was the best decision I could have made!

I hope you have enjoyed and thank you for reading! xxx


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Instagram | #1

I’m going to do a weekly review of my Instagram posts because I think its a fun lil way to keep updated on my weeks and for myself to remember what the heck I’ve actually been doing with my life!

This was a night where I was reading the new Harry Potter and The Cursed Child whilst watching Gossip Girl. Now my Saturday nights are free, this is usually how you will find me; reading a book, watching Gossip Girl with a glass of wine right next to me! How exciting for a newly 18 year old, I know!

I took the photo of the Birmingham Library on Friday when I went for a day out with my boyfriend (there will be a blog post!) and yes, it is as amazing as you think it would be! I’m so excited to be able to travel to Birmingham more as of next month when I start university! Its such an amazing city and all just a train ride away!

I cut a messy fringe in! I’m also messing around with my hair and can never decide what to do with it! Last month I had brown/pink hair, this month I have highlights and a full fringe! Who knows what next month could bring!

Once again, another photo from Birmingham! This time it is of Grand Central which is absolutely amazing! I have never been on the top floor and all the food it offers is just amazing! They have sushi bar’s, Vietnamese food stand, and my favorite; BUBBLE TEA STAND! The only issue is, which food choice do you pick first?!

This photo was actually from a blog post that I don’t think I’m going to upload, but it is The Great Gatsby which I’ve just recently purchased! I needed to add a few classics to my book collection. Only issue is I need to find the space to store all of my books now! Oops.

Just an upload of a photo from my previous blog post, July Favorites. A bit of self-promo never hurt anybody!

I went to see Finding Dory finally! My boyfriend treated me to a cinema date and Finding Dory was everything I has wished for and more! Obviously we had to end the day with a Costa whilst keep repeating, ‘Hi, I’m Dory. I suffer from short term memory loss!’.

I did my hair and make-up and was rather proud of it so its just your regular selfie right here!

Once again, this was a photo from a never-going-to-be-posted blog post! I’m so excited to read this book since its going to be made into a film! I better get reading I guess!

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Summer Yankee Candle Haul!

Summer wouldn’t be summer without a range of wonderful smelling candles from my favorite range, Yankee Candles! Although my household has been an avid Yankee Candle customer since I can remember, I never had my own collection or set in my room; therefore I decided to finally purchase my own candle holder and a set of candles! So lets get straight into it!

I got all of my products on a trip to Barmouth. On the way there, we stopped off in Welshpool at The Old Station. In there was your typical cute little bits and bobs that you may only find on your travels, but whilst looking around I stumbled across a Yankee Candle stand and pretty much bought everything with the 30% price tag! I’m not too sure whether Yankee have a deal on everywhere or whether it was just this store in particular, but in this post I will use the prices off of the website!

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To begin with, I decided to get a holder and the votive candles. This means that I get more choice of candles without spending too much! I picked out the Crosshatch Small Pillar Holder which cost £4.99. This particular one has a glass holder with the crosshatch design separately. So whether you can mix and match with similar designs I’m not sure? Either way it was the type that matched the theme of my room the best whilst also giving a bohemian feel!

The candles I bought all came in a house-like packaging which is absolutely adorable! The set comes with 6 candles and has a scent which everybody would love. Some actually remind me of smells I’ve experience in my life but can’t quite recall where! The retail price for the house of candles I shall call it was £10.99, where as I paid £7.69. I also bought an autumn/winter smelling candle called Pain Au Raisin just because it was 30% off and to die for! Originally, it is £1.80.

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This specific collection includes:

  • Sicilian Lemon- £1.80
  • Riviera Escape- £1.80
  • Lavender- £1.80
  • Olive & Thyme- £1.80
  • Summer Peach- £1.80
  • Sea Salt & Sage- £1.80

The Sea Salt & Sage scent is most reminiscent to me as it reminds me of my dad’s aftershave that he wore when I was younger! It reminds me of whenever we were going out somewhere special with my family and he would literally put the whole bottle of it on! Particularly my favorites include the Summer Peach, Lavender and Sicilian Lemon!

These specific scents I feel can make you remember times in your life that you may not of remembered before you smell them! They can take you back to a particular time and make you feel all warm and safe! Also there is definitely something for everybody in this collection and within those candle choices, so if you’re just looking to start purchasing Yankee Candles, I’d start with one of these! The candles do smell how the name makes you expect them too!

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I do hope you enjoyed this blog post and if you have any particular favorite candle from Yankee Candle, please let me know down in the comments section! I’m really wanting to buy more and find my true favorite scent! I will most likely do another one of these types of blog posts near winter time and Christmas because we all know that is when Yankee Candle are at their prime!
Thank you for reading and the constant support!
Liv xxx

Ridding of Negative Energy

Since not being at sixth form and being finished with revision, I have found myself in my free time, thinking a lot about the person I am, the type of person I wish to become, and the things that are holding me back. This has bought on numerous memories, remembering past friends and many experiences I have been through which still bring me down whenever I think about them. I know that life is going to be great from this point on, and how the future starts here with university and meeting new people, but I feel that ridding myself of negative energy is the only solution to me fully immersing myself into this new venture of my life! Therefore, I decided to create a blog post of how important it is to see through the past and come out the other-side a much more open minded human being!

To begin with, I have found the main negativity revolving around my life is trying to hold on to past friendships. I always find myself remembering the old times and laughs that I had with my then-friends, and wondering if there was anyway possible that those times could happen again. But then I begin to remind myself of the personality traits those people contained, both good and bad. I would remember arguments and moments in that friendship that made me think ‘do I even want this person in my life anymore?’. The truth is, if I had moments of questioning the friendship and whether I wanted them in my life then, I know that the answer to my wondering whether the friendship could ever happen again is not recommended. Also, I have been living my life perfectly fine, if not better without them involved in my day-to-day travels. I feel you have to just completely rid those people out of your life, even if that means to un-follow them on social media, walking another route to your destination, anything like that! These things take time but I feel that it will be worth it!

Another negativity in my life is caring too much what others think of me and whether I will be accepted the way I am. Now this is down to a confidence issue, but I have my own personal identity within me, my own way of living, opinions, interests, beliefs, I am unique! I should never be afraid of what others think, because I know that there are over 7 billion people on this planet and I know there will be a few of those who will accept the way I am! I already have a number of amazing people in my life who accept the way I was created and I can’t be more thankful and appreciative for them!

I have come a long way from the way I used to be. I am a happier and more optimistic human being. There a just a few little blips in the way of me being completely happy. I need to learn how to accept that the past is the past, and that I am me and should be proud of that. I should learn to change a negative situation into more of a positive no matter how difficult that may be. Don’t get me wrong, I was never on the path of being completely low and giving up, but I have indeed had my moments.

I understand what I need to do to become a happier individual and how to rid myself of this negative energy that constantly revolves any situation where I am alone and have time to think. People will always have a memory of the way you are or the way you used to be. Some of those you will never be able to change, but I am determined to make myself a better memory for people to remember me by. Of the person who I want to be remembered as; caring, loving and kind with a hint of fabulousity and wittiness.

As Goi Nasu once said:

“An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.”


 

I hope you enjoyed this quick blog post! Thank you for reading! xxx

 

 

The Little Things

I would like to take a little moment to apologise for my lack of posts! Exam season is finally done and after months of revision, rehearsals and stress, I am completely done with sixth form! So I am back and here to stay, doing what I truly enjoy which is writing blog posts, reading books and listening to new music!


Now I have done my explaining, the idea behind this blog post is inspired by youtuber/instagrammer Simply_Kenna. If you’re not sure who she is, I will link her Youtube page and instagram here and here. Her personality and lifestyle is truly inspirational through her beliefs and ideals, not to mention her instagram feed (it is pretty much life-changing how perfect it is!). If you’re interested, check out her sites!

Besides all this, through following her on social media for a while, her posts have made me realise how important it is to focus on the little things in life, as this can be what makes our lives happy! So, I sat down with a pen and paper and jotted down all the little things in life that make me unbelievably happy. I know that these are pretty accurate, as when I was writing them I was getting all excited and giddy about them! Here are my little things in life that create my ultimate happiness!

Early morning walks and bike rides
Whether this be sunny and warm with a slight breeze or a cold, grey and rainy morning, I absolutely adore early morning walks no matter what the season or weather. When the paths and roads are quiet and all you can hear is the birds tweeting from the trees, the crunch of leaves in the autumn from people getting their morning papers, this is when I feel most at ease and feel as if the world is at peace no matter what disruption is occurring in the world. It gives me calming feelings throughout the whole day.

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Drinking alone in a coffee shop
I am a complete people watcher. Watching people go about their daily business’, wondering what their lives are like, whether they are happy, whether its their birthday soon, anything! I will look at a person and think about how they are doing and what they are like. Try it, you see anybody in the street, begin to wonder what their past may have been like, how their future is looking. It makes you feel like its not just you existing in this world and everybody walking around you actually do exist and just like you, have feelings and emotions.

The smell of books
There is just something absolutely magical about the smell of old and new books. The comfort they bring when you’re snuggling into your reading space, ready to explore a world that isn’t your own. Escaping the daily schedule and hustle and bustle that is your life. I sometimes feel that just the smell and feel of a book in your hands can be more calming then actually reading it!

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Rain in a conservatory
Now, I am not sure whether you have ever experienced a storm in a glass conservatory, but getting cosy with the TV on, a cup of coffee or tea in your hand with a blanket draping you like a cape is one of the best feelings in the world. It is like experiencing everything that comes with the rain, but being in the comfort of your home and watching the raindrops link together and race each other down the window. The crashing of the rain on the roof getting harder and then softer as the rain slows down is my favorite on rainy days.

Listening to an artist/band for the first time
The feeling of listening to a song and getting halfway through and just thinking ‘this song is actually amazing and will be the theme tune for the rest of my life’ is one of my favorite. After this feeling I usually go ahead and listen to all of their albums, create a Spotify playlist of them and listen to them everyday for three months until I realise I have become slightly obsessed and need to calm down.

Finding ‘that’ quote
Its that one quote that you want tattooed on your entire body and never want to forget. At the moment, I have a few quotes that are like that to me. Currently, my favorite quote is ‘Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience’- Ralph Waldo Emerson. To me, this quote simply means there is no need to rush anything, and that anything meant to be good/perfect (although I believe nothing is perfect), will take its time.

Seeing that one person after ‘one of those days’
Now I don’t intend this to be cheesy, but seeing my boyfriend after a rough day at sixth form was my absolute favorite thing. Seeing his car just gave me a sense of relief and knowledge that everything is going to be okay and everything is only temporary (which indeed it was). In moments of arguments and my silly moods, he would always go along with it and actually put up with me, and its finding those types of people in your life that really makes everything worth it.

Long car journeys
People find it strange that I enjoy sitting in a car or coach for hours, daydreaming out the window, listening to music, but I love the feeling of traveling to an entirely new destination and experience new things. For example, on my trip to Disneyland Paris, I was stuck on a coach for 14 hours, maybe longer, but I could easily do it all over again. My favorite thing to also go alongside long car journeys is travel stations. I love getting a coffee and seeing so many people all in a place going in different directions, across the country and possibly across the world!

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So there were my little things in life that create my ultimate happiness! I really recommend trying this, because it will make you realise just how much the little things can impact on your life and make everything that little brighter when you feel like everything is wrong!

Thanks for reading! xxx

New Beginnings!

Growing up and going to university is literally all I can think and talk about right now! With exams quickly approaching, I can’t help but be SO excited for all the new adventures and life journeys that I am going to be embarking on! With that being said, I am determined to start living life properly and doing what I want to do compared to what others think is best for me.

One of the first things I am seriously excited (but terrified) about is jumping out of my comfort zone. As I’ve grown older, I’ve started to see the world for what it really is, but forgetting to think about the good things that is intertwined with those negatives. Therefore, I am determined to focus on the positives in all aspects of life, more importantly the world. If you are positive within the world you live in, that can create a happier environment right? Plus, it will allow me to travel alone or with people, and do the things I want with nothing holding me back, (unless I don’t have the money of course!)

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Something about life that is going to seriously change this year is I’m going to be leaving school for real this time! I explain in my blog post ‘The Next Step’ about sixth form, but I am finally going to be officially leaving when my last exam is done which is 67 days away! You think that after Year 11 and once you finish your GCSE’s that your life is going to be so much different and you will get treated as an adult! I have to say, it has been nothing like that! It have been stuck in the same environment for 7 years now and I am itching to get out! Once again, even though I’m seriously excited, I am absolutely terrified! But this ties in with me jumping out my comfort zone!

Experiencing new things about the world and myself, as well as meeting new people is another thing I am extremely excited about! I sometimes seem to forget that I am only 17 years old, and that it is absolutely FINE that I haven’t experienced much right now! Everybody takes their own time to grow into the person they’re meant to be and continue to do so throughout the whole of their life, and new experiences help people to grow into the person they were destined to be! I have a whole life in front of me and I feel that this summer and my life after sixth form is where I will begin to experience all the things that I want to!

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So although this transition is an extremely big part of my life and there is nothing I can do to slow down this time, all I can do is begin to get prepared for the next stage of the chapter in my life! And I have never been so excited!

The Next Step

Getting an education in the UK is compulsory, and you need to stay in some form of education until you’re 18, whether that be college, an apprenticeship or sixth form. For me, I felt the route of sixth form was the best path, although I wasn’t particularly looking forward to it. Don’t get me wrong, I still don’t really enjoy it, but the more I travel to university open days and interviews, the more it hits me that soon I won’t be in the same building I have been travelling to for seven, nearly eight years now.

From what I’ve read, university is one of the biggest steps to anticipate in your life if you choose to go down that road. Although I am beyond excited to go to university, I can’t help but feel rather sad and extremely nervous to leave the building in which I have spent almost half of my life in! However, the contrasting idea of leaving the building that has led me into this chapter of my life excites me, while also making me feel like a Disney princess embarking on their new adventure!

University was never my first choice for the future. I was so indecisive before I chose to study Media and Communications. I went from every job occupation you could think of. I believed I could be a music composer, a travel agent, primary school teacher, EVERYTHING! My issue was I knew how many opportunities there are in this world, and limiting it down to just one was mentally impossible for me to do! Oh, I still have no clue on what I want to do once I leave university, I have no idea how much I am going to enjoy university. But as it all becomes closer, I believe that I am starting to get closer to the future I truly want, while also realising that I am good enough and smart enough to go to university and succeed!

So it is about 5 months until everything is all done with sixth form, and the creation of unconditional offers allows me to be accepted into university before I even take my exams. This means, by deciding on the correct university, I am definitely going to university this year, and I am going to be embarking on this next step in my life. I still have no idea on how to feel about that, but I will tell you that when I get there!

 

(I have created this blog post more for personal experience. A few years down the line, I’m going to enjoy flicking back to this blog post and reading everything I was feeling at this current point in time. I want to see how much life has changed! Either way, I hope you have enjoyed!) 

 

 

Therapeutic Colouring for Adults!

When I heard the trend of colouring books for adults coming into fashion, I couldn’t contain my excitement! I saw numerous people on Instagram and Twitter, showing their most recent design and just HAD to get one! Not only are they just a great way to feel nostalgic and experience being a kid again, but they are also a great way to relax after a busy day of work, school or revision and are extremely therapeutic!

The two I picked up from Waterstones include  I Love Colouring and the popular Johanna Basford Enchanted Forest. 

What I enjoy most about them, especially the I Love Colouring one, is the various design patterns they offer from trippy spirals to tree-house’s with pink birds! The only issue is with this is the time passes sooooo quickly! So I recommend settling down with your colouring book AFTER you have finished whatever work it is you have to complete!

They also make great presents for birthdays and Christmas’s! If you know somebody in your family who enjoy’s art or you feel could do with some time out from work, suggest this to them! I got my dad the Lost Ocean one by Johanna Basford and he loves it! They vary in price from the sizes and designs you get! They are also very easy to purchase! From what I’ve heard from other people is they are sold through Amazon, Waterstones and Supermarket branches such as ASDA and Tesco.

So if you’re stuck on ideas for presents, these are a great shout! Or if you just need to find a new way to relax and the suggestion of YOGA really doesn’t appeal, grab yourself a colouring book and get cosy!

 

I Love Colouring- £5.99

Enchanted Forest- £9.95